[Zhautas] Bangr

[conjobs]

My Bangr has moved

bangr

John Constantine | 36

Exorcist, demonologist, and Master of the Dark Arts. At your service.

✓	✕
YES <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#33cc33;">✓</span>	NO <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#CC0000;">✕</span>

Comments

[wont_be_me]

✓

Those skills don't seem applicable to the scenario. A useless advertisement?

[conjobs]

Should I change it to my cocksucking and pussy eating skills, you think?

[wont_be_me]

I do. It would be a much more intriguing resume.

[conjobs]

Well. I'd hate to boast about something I'm no good at. Maybe I can give you a demo and you can tell me what to put on my advertisement?

[wont_be_me]

I assumed the demonology line was really an excuse to put off the hookup.

[conjobs]

Too bookwormish?

[wont_be_me]

That, or intellectually stunted by a cult.

[ She's snooty about it. She was from the civilized, scientific world. Cults lived on the edges of the civilized universe, scavenging on forgotten planets in the hopes of expansions which usually lead to famine or massacre. Sometimes they huddled together in corridors of the space stations, trying to gather enough converts to have some say in the politics of the place. The bounty hunters found it more irritating than salutary. ]

[conjobs]

Intellectually, physically and emotionally, I'm afraid.

[wont_be_me]

That joke was too self-aware for me to buy it.

[conjobs]

You got me. I'm damaged goods par excellence trying to pass for a half-decent bloke.

[wont_be_me]

I like damaged men.

[conjobs]

You're in luck. The planet's full of them.

I'm not interested in you saving or fixing or taming me, love. Keep swiping.

[wont_be_me]

Hah.

[ Haaaaaaah. ]

Did I come across as nurturing? I must not be representing myself well either.

[conjobs]

[That piques his interest at least. Most people would have found him offputting by now and, well. Kept swiping.] Did you have something else in mind? [He's already had a few questionable incidents involving aphrodisiacs and compromised sanities - he doesn't want to be labelled the planet rapist, so he's offering to let her take the lead.]

[wont_be_me]

I don't want to be your friend, but I do want to get to know you.

[conjobs]

I think I can manage that. What room are you in, and do you have any water?

[wont_be_me]

13, and I don't provide refreshments.

[ Thirteen. It's her number. Like the bad penny she is. ]

[conjobs]

That's too bad. We could have had wine.

[wont_be_me]

[ She doesssn't know about your sweet Earth religious shit 8( ]

I don't drink.

[conjobs]

[That just makes Constantine want to spam the X right now but he'll humour her, just the once.] I shouldn't show up empty handed. I'll bring something else.

[wont_be_me]

[ She almost tells him that the chances of her wanting anything he brings her are just about zero, but she decides not to care about it. Instead she just unlocks the door and waits. ]

[conjobs]

[Flowers? She didn't strike him as the romantic type. Fruit basket? She'd wonder if they were poisoned or full of that alien viagra. Teddy bear? She'd either rip it to shreds or insist on turning this into some magic freak show.

He settles for a packet of something that looks like M&Ms. Yeah, sure, he got it from the vending machine. Sue him. He knocks politely before he tries the door and steps inside.] Are you decent darling?

[wont_be_me]

[ She is. Dressed in athletic wear that clings to the shape of her, not curvaceous but certainly fit. It's a sleeker look than her usual steel-toed boots, cargo pants, and leather jacket. ]

What did you bring?

[ Her look expects to be disappointed, but it actually changes. Someone loves candy. ]

[conjobs]

Uh... they look like M&Ms? They're colourful little chocolates with hard crispy shells. [She's probably going to roll her eyes and tell him she knows exactly what M&Ms are, but better be safe than her thinking he's trying to feed her some aphrodisiacs or rohypnol or something.

Stepping in a little closer, he offers it to her with a smile. Maybe it was the right move to reserve the X for now.] Do you like these? [They are just getting to know each other, right? Small talk is as good as anywhere else to start.]

[wont_be_me]

What is M&M meant to stand for?

[ An incredulous look. She assumes it is some Earth thing. Why are so many of the volunteers from Earth? As far as she knows it was an uninhabitable rock. It also makes most of these people some primitive ancestor to the kind of human she is. ]

It doesn't matter. [ Seriously. The fuck does she care. ] I like it.

[ She lets him in to the small room, finding a piece of furniture to perch on herself. There's a faint singed smell in the room. She and the roommate had a fiery disagreement about the space. ]